Hi, my name is Patrick. I’m 15 years old and I currently live in a Black Bandana commune. As you may know, Anarchy has finally been accepted as a valid and respectable “government”. Organizations such as the Black Bandana make sure that other countries don’t mess with the small towns that are run on a trust system or more properly known as Anarchy. These small towns are shut off from other society’s and national governments. Let me show you around what I call home. We do a lot of things that may be different or socially unacceptable in your country or government. Things like working and making money, schooling, and law making as well as political decisions in general. All of these concepts are run on trust and equality.
Nobody in our town has to work, but the people who live here are smart enough to know that they need to work together to survive. People go to outside colleges to learn a trait that they can be of use of in the commune. Before someone goes to work, they get interviewed to make sure they won’t try to tear down the Anarchist system. This is the only form of inequality ever experienced in town. Once they are positive that these people are qualified, then they are allowed to work. If someone can’t make it to work then anyone can volunteer to fill the gap. The interview’s are used to make sure that this person won’t try to mess anything up. They don’t have set work times, the workers just trust some people to show up. Because they volunteer you may wonder how money is used in the town. We have a flow of money that is recycled in both the shops and the townspeople who don’t work. This makes it so people have money to buy food and the workers can order more food for the shops. The money flowing through the town allows the townspeople thrive and interact with other nations. Most of the shops are also pay-what-you-want so if someone is having difficulty with money, they can pay what they can afford at the moment. This trust system can make or break the town depending on the people. Especially since we constantly get protesters that feel Anarchy should never be allowed in a nation or a small town. These protesters often try to get into work and destroy the pay-what-you-want business. This is one of the other forms of inequality that has to be used. We send them on there way and make sure they never come back. The other types of people that come are to utilize our schools. These schools are designed to let the children or adults in it, come up with the profession they desire. The school I go to in my commune has initial classes on History, Math, Language, and Science. After about five optional years worth of classes at an age you want, you can choose to go into independent learning. Some of the kids would rather go to a school in which they are always taught the initial classes so they go to boarding school. Our town accepts this and lets them go. The other kids try to teach themselves a trait based on what they enjoyed. These interest vary from Psychology all the way to being a Lawyer. The teachers are there so they can aid the students with books and research. The teachers never force any work upon them but the students still need help from them. This convinces students to stick to their passion even if it gets hard. I’ve been working in Production and writing. I want the world to read and watch my work and leave with a new perspective on life. The teachers in English help me to work on grammar and sentence structure, etc. I even had a chance to help a friend in a play which helped me to understand what production feels like ( Not Related but Thanks Meg). This just goes to show that a country doesn’t need all-around classes to get kids into good jobs. All you need is an aid and experience in the field you want to go to. Sure it doesn’t always work, but if you stick to what you love, “proper schooling” won’t be needed. Political leaders could also be a thing of the past if everyone followed our method of decision making. Sure we don’t have laws in our town and that may seem a bit chaotic to you, but we make it work. We function largely on a trust system but sometimes people have to go. If someone decides to mass-murder everyone then we work together to make him/her leave. Sure it isn’t complete Anarchy but it sometimes has to be done. However when we want to expand or improve the town, we go to the Town Hall and have an open discussion. Everyone with a thought shares it, and people (on their own time) try to make it a reality. It may get a bit hard especially if the idea doesn’t work but we try to sift through the ideas. Once that is done some people volunteer to work for the proposed good ideas. If it is a building project, depending on what it is, takes about a year or so. Other projects like community service take as long as they need to. We never leave anything before it’s finished to prevent an overflow of projects. I find it to be very efficient and it keeps everyone happy with where they are living. If people don’t get a chance to share their ideas, then a commune like ours could never work. As you can tell, our commune has a few negatives and difficulties but so do neighboring nations. On a national scale, Anarchy could never work but our town makes it. Even if it seems unorthodox we still thrive with 100% equality. No leaders, No officials, No President, No Representatives, nothing. We may never be socially accepted as a respectable government but as long as we have this chance to live in this town, we are all happy. I love the jobs people volunteer for, the school I go to, and the political decisions we all have a say in. Sure I would like to change a few things but I still love this town.
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I, along with Jared, would like to profusely apologize for all the random posts out of nowhere. I have been on vacation in Hawaii like a 1 Percent muthafucka! I will be home on the 24th and by then I hope to return back to the regular posting times. Also expect a few grammatical errors in this next story. Usually my more serious story's are without editing. I don't care how many views I get, I just enjoy having my thoughts heard my the two or three people that continue to read it.
It was recently my birthday and I don't mean to be an attention whore, but I had a dramatic drop in my "Happy Birthday" posts on Facebook. I think it may have been because of some “controversial” and “offensive” stories that I wrote. As you all know Facebook is a social networking system that 99% of the time fails us. Be it grammar or conserving the innocence of 12 year old girls, Facebook is terrible. I hate the constant posts that go a little something like this "Wit ma bitchez #WhoringAround #YOLO #HotGirlsHaveProblemsToo" If you ever see this, it's probably from a 12 year old girl who needs attention. She probably has a bunch of stupid quotes that are about her "troubled life". She may constantly talk about the love that she lost and how she will never love the same way again. However, Facebook pulled through and helped a country to spread ideas about change in the government. The one time that Facebook came through was with the recent activity in Egypt. The peoples ability to get their ideas out about the government was what slightly aided them to end Gadhafi's reign. It also started a new fad used constantly by a certain British Kid who will go unnamed. What I am trying to get across, is that Social Networking systems can be used for good. If people decided to post about a meaningful topic more often, then maybe we could get farther in society. Besides posts about #YOLO and Gadhafi, there is also the dreaded birthday posts. You know what I am talking about. But what I find interesting, is the decision for someone to write, “hb” or “Happy Birthday”. What does it show about the relationship between you and said poster. Allow me to digress. No matter what your social status is, who you are, or what you enjoy, you will get notifications about your birthday from everyone. Their may be one difference you notice when scrolling through all of them however. Some closer friends write happy birthday and maybe even a short message. Others, however, write, “hb”Just in case you were wondering, “hb” means happy birthday. This to me shows the overall laziness and dislike for the birthday kids wall. If you don’t like the person whose birthday it is, then don’t post. They don’t care, and they probably don’t like you either. Personally, when I see, “hb” written on my wall, I feel offended. I can tell that this person doesn’t like me. So if you don’t like the person, don’t write, “hb”. I, and a couple other’s I hope, would sooner have 20 nice notifications of relatives and close friends then 400 notifications of people I/We don’t know. So think before you post. Is it really worth writing, “hb”? Know that the person won’t feel any better or satisfied that they received a post from you. Nobody wants to spend their time on Facebook, leafing through random bullshit trying to find notes from relatives or a best friend. This isn’t my subtle way of telling the world to not post on my wall. I don’t care if they keep posting on my wall or if they stop. I just want them to know that it is pointless and on occasion offensive. Once again, I apologize for the random posting days. Jared and I will make sure to go back to the normal posting routine once I get home. But please stop posting messages that nobody wants. It is annoying and I am surely not the only one who feels offended or pissed off at the people who write, “hb”. My perspective on the zombie apocalypse is not just a super awesome way to kill thousands of zombies, but it is also an escape from reality. As we all know this generation sucks and we are doing all we can to cope with YOLO, Disney, and all the slutty child idols in between. Everyone who has a “strong distaste” for this generation and shares my perspective knows what I am talking about. So far we can’t do anything about about it but read rage comics from people with similar ideals. If you don’t know what happened in the past couple of weeks then allow me to explain.
Over the past couple of weeks there have been some strange accounts that took place in different parts of the world. One account that particularly stands out involves a “Drug Induced Rage”. A man got high on bath salts and PCP and decided to eat a homeless mans face-off. Certain questions have risen from this but how does one get high off bath salts is mine. Clearly the government lied about that like they faked the moon landing. Off course they had to take action so they said the PCP is what kept him alive after being shot six times. This, however, is not the only account. Around the time of this event a woman ate her baby. Yes, you heard me right, a woman ate her fucking baby. There is nothing that can be done to cover that one up. She ate her child. This is not only shocking but a way to confirm the zombie apocalypse. Let’s give all the normal non-nerd type kids a little background knowledge. The zombie apocalypse has been predicted to be at several different times. It should have happened during Y2K, but it didn’t. It should have happened during 6/6/6, but it didn’t. We have finally correctly predicted the first outbreak. It’s 2012 and time to kill some worthless zombies. But to me, killing zombies isn’t the main goal. To me, I think it’s a way to get rid of the shitty generation we are living in. Just think. If all the nerds, who have prepared forever for the apocalypse had a chance to get rid of the generation they hate so much, they would, wouldn’t they. While they have all the prepared experience to kill the zombies while the “popular kids” don’t, they have a way to start a new generation. This may just be my perspective on the zombie apocalypse but look deep fellow nerds, is this really just a way to kill stuff and look badass, or do you want a nerd Utopia? I received some feedback from my blog and decided to prove that person wrong. What I write is not meaningless and I try to show some purpose by the end of my pretentious bullshit. So this next story will contain no meanlingless profanity, no sexual innuendo, and no empty meaning
Faceless Freshman "Bye Honey! Have a great day!" "Hmm" "Honey you are going to do great! It's your first day of High School" "Yeah I guess" "Have a wonderful day! I Love You!" "... Love you too mom" I walk inside and already regret the confidence I had built up. I walk down the first hallway, bumping into giant seniors and their verbal abuse. "Faggot" "Fucking Freshman" "Retard" Have become some of my new alias's. When I get to my class, I feel terrible. Like I'm meaningless. Of course I have to shrug this off and greet some of my classmates and "friends" when they see me walk in. "Hey, What's up?" "How was your summer" and other question arise when I walk over. I say a couple of things but nobody listens. I try to open people up with a joke but being awkward in this situation, I mess up. Stares and smirks from all of the "cool kids" "Faggot" "Shut the Fuck Up" "Nobody Likes You"Yeah, Yeah I know. I'm a terrible person and nobody likes me. To my class "friends" I'm a social outcast, but whatever. Just more stupid nonsense to pretend never happened. Well Shit. Power Hour. Where Anarchy lives and breeds. No place to sit for fear of more angry glares and homophobia. I decide to use my new highschool freedom and walk around. A couple of my real friends meet up with me and we talk about all of the nerdy stuff that we can't always express. Then, of course, a couple of un-accepting douchebags walk by. Being in a group I can ignore, shrug off, and fire back insults to gain some empty confidence. Power Hour ends and I head to Gym. Bullying is very prevalent in school, even though some people feel it isn't. Even if you are joking it may hurt the person more than you think. Think before you offend someone's race, culture, or sexual orientation.I apologize for this whiney bull-shit but it was to prove a point. 1PercentIrony will suck less next week and I pray that I don't lose all of the viewers with this. *Insert Sexual Innuendo and Isolation Jokes What's your favorite color? According to the mainstream, Mine's YOLO! #YOLO means you only live once, say it again and I'll fucking end you. Sure
#YOLO is a creative way to get shitfaced, pregnant or jailed but with the constant overuse of the term, someone needs to step in. A simple number sign and an abbreviation won't help you he rid of the herpes you already have. One of the Outstanding problems is the origins of #YOLO as well. #YOLO originated as a lyric from an innocent song that created a bigger shitstorm then religion. Now it seems To be in modern linguistics. Although, if you still don't know what a #Hashtag is, please allow me to digress. A #Hashtag is a simple way for kids to abbreviate the stupid shit they do. When you post on facebook about the two light beers you had last night, simply write #FuckingWasted. These #Hashtags might be tolerated if they were some level of maturity but #QuiteIndubitablyWasted isn't any better. Sadly with my small intelligence on the subject I don't know the point of a #Hashtag. Some theories from Jared and other anonymous influences think its subliminal messaging. Some say it means, "where are the bitches?". Others think it's a code word for girls sexual activity. To me, #YOLO is just another idiotic phrase that wil go out of style with, "Zieg Hiel" and other terms from genocides of that magnitude.#Hashtags ar dumbing down our nation and I don't want to be forever isolated. It's bad enough that every slut in America hates me, but if the drinks douchebags and Darien bitches for lack of a D-word, then I am the 1%. And for once in my life this is not the position I want to be in. #Hashtags as I have said multiple times are an epidemic and can not be stopped without cooperation. Make the choice to not use them and together he can say #FuckModernLinguistics. Even though I do agree with the changing language this is too much. If the use goes up all faith in humanity will be lost. Another apocalypse will begin. Get ready for your notification bar to light up as you are pushed to the brink of insanity. #StopHashtags... #Shit (I would like to acknowledge the previous mistake made in Prostitutes and Dress up. I will no longer confuse my audience with the mis-spelling of the word minor) -Jack In a beautiful town of Alabama, or Texas... Maybe it was Kansas... No wait, Tennessee... What-fucking-ever. In the lovely town of Winceston lived a lovely girl and her lovely mother. They had lovely friends and lovely pastimes, ok fuck this shit. This is the tale of an 8 year old gutter slut and her encouraging mom.
Mother and Daughter occasionally don't get along but at this magnitude, surely there is a deeper problem. And there is, Welcome to the set of toddlers and tiaras where there is always a chance to exploit someone's race or ethnicity and in this case, age. I was raised learning that exploitation of a miner, be it on the interwebs or via a text, is illegal. Apparently if it is shown on television, it's legal. 8 year old girls wearing the skimpiest of clothing that leaves little to what the imagination doesn't want to see. The worse yet is the fact that the girls of my generation eats that stuff up. Sluttiness is very prevalent in said generation. As you know from previous stories from my fan-fucking-tastic Life, I hate sluts. It pisses me off especially when they march around the school having, slut walks, and whore pride rallies. Jailbait and 14 old girls that resemble any D-Squad hooker and once again isolates me. And for what? But with this sudden spur of sluttiness encouraged by parents who wouldn't jump at this legal chance. Toleration levels are decreasing with the popularity in Toddlers and Tiaras. Soon toleration will be at a loss and children will become sex slaves. All this because of a sudden decision for parents to allow a certain level of sluttiness in their family. A huge apocalypse in which, I will once again be isolated and you reader will be in complete utter isolation... Or one of my child slaves that assists me in the ironic battle against child slavery Being biased-as-fuck and opinionated to the point of isolation, I decided to convince my fellow cultists that without te assassination of the destined DHS leader, the 4th Reich would begin, killing all Liberal Anarchists, (redundantly redundant). For the sake of anonymity names have been changed to protect those in the running. The destined leader was the right winger himself. The god-fearing, authority loving, administration hating, Mr. Foxy. With a never depleting passion for change, Foxy wanted a fascist police state. He wanted a police officer on campus during school hours. He also wanted to crack down on the administration so the student body can have some much needed breathing space. But you can't expect for people to side with you when you have a police force and your side and drugged-up teachers. Very blatantly trying to overthrow the faculty won't get you far. A joke campaign would work better. And it did. Another man in the running who for this story will go under the alias of dazed and confused. Mr. DAC lost a bet with a friend and ran for president. His policies were along the lines of, "we should, uh, have more fun". And with those beautiful, articulate words, the student body was taken by storm. The amount of votes were higher then students in the school and revotes were cast through paper ballots. Sadly his supporters faith must have dwindled because he lost. With many theories and conspiracies, I think a good old fashion rigging by the teachers took place. And in my opinion, it's mystery gang montage worthy. But don't listen to
me for voting advice. Be it the school elections of the presidential elections. "don't vote if you feel it just holds us down" (Ramshackle Glory) I have been blessed by God to get to hang out with the cheerleaders. Oh, you
don't go to DHS non-existent reader, Well let me give you a brief history lesson. For as long as I can remember, being a cheerleader is symbolic. Not symbolic of team work or spirit. No my friend, it is for closet and open sluts. Yes self proclaimed whores, proud cum-sluts and bitches ready to fornicate with anyone who presents their penis. Sure being friends with them comes with some sexual benefits, but their pride shocks me. It really annoys me but seeing them in their natural habitat is quite interesting. When confronted by undesirables, they use words such as "faggot" and "retard" in order to drive off the predators. This method is very efficient in a long term removal of said undesirable. When approached by an attractive mate, the bitches shower the mate with gifts and laughter. Eventually one of the girls will be thrown into a relationship with the mate. These relationships last from 5 days to 4 weeks. When they separate the mate is shut off from the group. What particularly fascinates me with this group are the alpha sluts. When paired with another alpha male, there relationship can lasts up to 4+ months. Even though all of the sluts appear to love their mate, no reproduction occurs. Forms of sexual contrapceptive such as hand and blow jobs (also referred to as oral sex) take place. This is to make up for the hormonal reactions of being in a pre-pubescent relationship. These theories are only an initial hypothesis but they may lead to a break in the cheer leading/ whore epidemic |
Jack OgilvieNow that my cynicism has balanced out I'd rather explain myself as an Anarchist with a passion for writing about, well, my passions. Enjoy the stuff I write but please don't be offended by the stuff I post. Archives
February 2013
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